On this episode of Straight Up With Stassi, Stassi catches up with her comedian BFF Rachael O’Brien to chat Beyonce, people who skip, and Mischa Barton’s CRAY spiral caught on video.
“Like happy skipping? Like frolicking?”
To kick off the show, Stassi tells a story about her most recent trip to the tanning salon.
“I get in my car, and it is a fucking seven minute drive. It would be a two minute drive if there wasn’t LA traffic,” she begins. “It’s the shortest ride to the tanning salon and I saw three people — separately, they didn’t know each other — skipping.”
“Skipping? Like happy skipping? Like frolicking?” Rachael asks.
“Frolicking,” Stassi confirms. “Like fucking skipping.”
“Like on the street?” Rachael asks.
“Yeah. At first I only saw one person skipping and I was like, ‘Well you’re fucking happy.'” Stassi says.
“Ive never seen one person in real life that was an adult on the street skipping,” Rachael says.
“Me neither,” Stassi says. “And then I saw another one and I’m like, ‘What the fuck is going on?’ Then I saw a fucking third and I almost pulled over to check Daily Mail. I was like, ‘Did something happen today?'”
“Are we doing like a charity, you know, everyone skip and everyone knows we’re supporting something?” Rachael says.
“At first I was fucking scared because I’m like, ‘Children of the Corn…’ That’s what skipping reminds me of,” Stassi says.
“I’m genuinely shocked right now,” Rachael says.
Once I finally parked, I sat there for a while being like, ‘Okay, did something political happen that everybodys excited about, was there a Facebook event that I wasn’t invited to…'”
“Was I supposed to make my Facebook photo like the rainbow flag…” Rachael adds.
“Was there something I was supposed to do today? Is everybody excited because Beyonce is fucking having twins… We’ll get to that,” Stassi says.
“Did you take a video of these people?” Rachael asks.
“No, but I Snapchatted my thoughts because I was like, ‘Is skipping like a thing?'” Stassi says.
“Can you describe what these people looked like? Were they on drugs?” Rachael asks.
“Normal fucking people in West Hollywood,” Stassi says. “Just happy as fuck. Skipping.”
“I can’t fathom this,” Rachael says.
“I didn’t know people skipped. Do people skip?” Stassi asks.
“I have never seen an adult ever do that,” Rachael says. “I barely see children do that anymore. I don’t even think it’s the style anymore for kids to do it.”
“I feel like you’d probably get made fun of as a kid if you skipped,” Stassi says.
“I believe you, I’m just not sure if you hallucinated or not,” Rachael says.
“I didn’t hallucinate,” Stassi says. “I know that for a fact. Dead fuckin sober.”
“I’m going to drive around all day tomorrow and try to find someone skipping because now I’m jealous,” Rachael says.
“I think now that I’m bringing awareness to skipping that people are now…”
“…You’re giving a voice to skippers,” Rachael says. “There’s a face to it now.”
“You know what, Bachelor? I’m mad at you right now.”
“I’m done being serious, I think, right now,” Stassi says.
“Just think of the people skipping,” Rachael says.
“Fuck them,” Stassi replies.
“They were happy,” Rachael says. “They were having a good day. That’s how I feel when I wake up still a little bit drunk and I don’t have a lot to do the next day. I’m just like, ‘This is gonna be a good day!'”
“Do you know that that is my fave?” Stassi asks.
“That is the best, when you’re just kind of silly,” Rachael says. “Some of our best Snapchats have come out of that.”
“Whenever I have to film for Vanderpump in the morning and I’m still, like, drunk, it is fucking hysterical,” Stassi says. “It’s so much fun. I’m not overthinking anything. I prefer to do every single scene next-day drunk.”
“Can you pause it real quick? I smell plastic,” Rachael says.
(After a quick pause…)
“Okay, so Rachael started smelling burning plastic and thought my apartment was going to burn down and then I started smelling it and I have no idea where it’s coming from so it’s freaking my brain out,” Stassi explains. “But now it’s gone away. Does that mean it’s a ghost?”
“You do smell things when there’s a ghost,” Rachael says.
“Oh my God, you don’t even watch The Bachelor, do you know what happened?” Stassi transitions.
“No, but do you want to tell me?” Rachael asks.
“On Monday night, they copied off of Vanderpump Rules. They went to New Orleans and they went to a haunted house, the Houmas House — which I’m shocked that they let them film there. You know what, Bachelor? I’m mad at you right now. It was the most ridiculous thing. It was a joke. They had a chandelier fall, they accidentally just happened to have a Ouija board underneath the sofa.”
“But I feel like The Bachelor tries to be cheesy sometimes,” Rachael says.
“The Bachelor by definition is cheesy, so is every reality TV show, but this was so over the top and it made such a mockery,” Stassi says.
“New Orleans really is haunted and scary feeling,” Rachael says.
“And the Houmas House is actually an old plantation house that you go and you visit it… It’s not a fucking joke. It’s not the Haunted Mansion,” Stassi says. “I agree with them filming there, but the way that they let them turn it into a movie set… it was so fucking annoying. Everyone was like, ‘Stassi! You’re going to love this episode, it’s New Orleans and haunted stuff,’ so I was so excited. I thought it was going to be like my version of Porn Hub or something — The Bachelor, New Orleans, and haunted stuff. Like, really? No.”