Your childhood crush impacts you forever

On this episode of Straight Up With Stassi, Stassi is joined by Zack Wickham, somebody she aspires to be “relatively as smart as.”

“I’m literally mind-blown right now.”

“So I fell into this black hole, and I found this ‘How the 1999 Version of The Mummy Changed My Life…’ We all fall into deep holes when we go on YouTube and then just keep clicking on things and then all of the sudden seven years of our lives have passed,” Stassi says. “When The Mummy came out, she was saying that she was not cool, she had all of these quirks, she never fit in. And when she saw The Mummy, she all of the sudden became obsessed. Think about if this has ever happened to you, because I related to this article so much. She found this movie, watched it, got the VHS, and she watched it every day when she’d come home from school, for months. She was obsessed and she thought that Brendan Fraser was the end-all-be-all. She started studying Egyptian history. She just engrossed herself in that movie like she wanted to become a part of it. And then, at the end of the article after she described how she felt about the movie, her point was that maybe the heroes that we watch as a child affect the way we are in relationships. Brendan Fraser’s character was her first crush, and that’s what she looked for when she found her husband.”

Stassi continues, “When I was reading this, I was like, ‘Let me think of the first time I felt obsessed with a dude that I didn’t know,’ and that was Moulin Rouge!, Ewan McGregor’s character, because he’s so sensitive, so obsessed with love, so passionate. He could be poor and didn’t care as long as he had love. That was my first memory of being like, so obsessed in a romantic way with an actor. I went back and thought about how I was in every relationship I’ve had, and what I’ve liked about people I’ve been with, and there’s a constant. Either they are passionate or they pretend to be.”

Zack says that for him, it was Bring It On. “Jessie Bradford,” he says. “I think that’s his name? Oh my God, did I literally just pull that out of my toupé? The main guy in Bring It On that dated Kirsten Dunst.”

“You are correct,” Stassi confirms.

“Shut up am I really? This is how obsessed I was,” he says. “When I saw how he treated Kirsten Dunst’s character, I’m not even lying…” Zack brings up a guy he’s dating-ish and says, “he literally treats me like that.”

“So you’re saying that Jessie Bradford’s character and the way he acted was what you were attracted to, and now you’re thinking about who you’re attracted to right now, and people you’re dating-ish, and he’s the same way?” Stassi asks.

“I’m not gonna lie,” Zack says, “I’m literally mind-blown right now.”

“I think you literally just broke down what gut instinct is.”

“In seventh grade I had this teacher, and we had to choose sides: Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera,” Zack recalls. “It was an English class. And we had to analyze the lyrics. She gave us Baby One More Time and Genie In A Bottle. By the way, in case anybody doesn’t know, I went to a Catholic Grade School. This is why I’m saying this — things influence you. We had to debate this. I’m not gonna lie, I was on the Christina side.”

“Fuck you Zack, honestly,” Stassi yells. “Get out.”

“Britney Spears, if you ever look at me, I would love you,” Zack jokes.

“Your teacher was either the worst or the best teacher ever because you now remember this,” Stassi says.

“Exactly,” Zack agrees. “Still.”

“Now you know how to debate, how to think about certain things,” Stassi says. “When certain things in your childhood impact you, which goes back to this fucking The Mummy shit, like… there are things that happen in your life growing up that shape you and you will never forget, and that affects all of your choices. Even if you don’t realize it.”

“It’s subconscious, 100%,” Zack says. “I would say that at least 50% of our decisions are based on our subconscious that we don’t even understand. I could be wrong, it could be 30%, but there’s gotta be a large percentage.”

“It’s instinctual now,” Stassi says. “When you turn into an adult, your reactions and the way that you feel about things are visceral and it feels instinctual. It’s ingrained in you, and its hard to shift that.”

“I think you literally just broke down what gut instinct is,” Zack says.




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