Sometimes you just need a solid heart to heart with your sister…

On this episode of Straight Up With Stassi, Georgie — Stassi’s little sister — joins for a heart to heart that only sisters can have together.

“I’m basically your very own sauna.”

“She’s little in that she’s.. well… she is a little person,” Stassi introduces Georgie. “Are you like, under 5 feet tall?” Stassi asks.

“I’m 5’1″… 5’2″, last time I checked,” Georgie says.

“Really? Okay. First thing I’m going to say: Speak as loudly as you can,” Stassi instructs.

“Okay,” Georgie says.

“When you just said, ‘Okay,’ that wasn’t as loudly as you can,” Stassi says.

“So you want me to scream into the microphone?” Georgie asks.

“Do you want me to just lower my voice so that I match yours?” Stassi asks. “No! It’s so crazy… am I obnoxious?”

“No!” Georgie says.

“Is my voice obnoxious?” Stassi asks. “I know I’m obnoxious sometimes, but is my voice obnoxious because it’s so loud?”

“No, I’ve never noticed it actually,” Georgie says. “I think, it’s like what we were talking about earlier — you’re more dominant, so you take charge. It’s just who you are.”

“In your headphones you don’t even notice that my voice is louder than yours because I’m so dominant as a human being?” Stassi asks.

“Yes,” Georgie confirms.

“Okay, well that’s interesting,” Stassi says. “But yes, you are my little sister, because I don’t believe you’re 5’1″, and you’re about to be 23 in a couple months. I’m about to be 30. I’m excited.”

“To be 30?” Georgie asks. “30, flirty and thriving?”

“30, flirty, and mother fucking thriving. Yes. Absolutely,” Stassi says. “Because I feel like your 20s suck.”

“Why?” Georgie asks.

“They’re not the best,” Stassi answers.

“Is that just because you didn’t have the best time?” Georgie asks.

“Oh, no, I’ve had such a good life,” Stassi says. “I’ve had a fun life, a rich life — rich as in full. I’ve experienced a lot, but the older I get… See? You don’t even know, because you’re not even to that point. When I was 22, I was not thinking, ‘Oh, I can’t wait to be 30.’ I was definitely not thinking that.”

“Why? I can’t wait to be 30,” Georgie says.

“You’re excited to be 30?” Stassi asks. “Why?”

“I don’t think you’ll agree with the reasons I have,” Georgie says. “Hopefully I’ll be married with kids, which is an experience I’m looking forward to.”

“But you don’t have to be 30 to be there,” Stassi says.

“But I would rather it be in my 30s than in my 20s,” George explains.

“This is what weirds me out — I wanted to have you on my podcast today because I have a lot of things that have been on my mind,” Stassi explains. “You’re my only sister — we have two brothers. And we could not be more different, in every single way.”

“Hallelujah,” Georgie jokes.

“You’re a whore,” Stassi retorts. “We’ve both chosen completely different paths in life.”

“Which I pride myself in,” Georgie says.

“You’re one of the most levelheaded human beings I’ve ever met,” Stassi says. “You’re way more mature than I am, and you’re 22. You’re mature in a different way. The way that you deal with conflict is very admirable and mature. Whereas I would like to light a house on fire. You know what I mean?”

“Okay, well, I would like to light a house on fire, but I just do it inside my mind instead of speaking, like it doesn’t just come out immediately,” Georgie explains.

“Ew. How do you control that?” Stassi asks.

“That is a great question, and when I find the answer, I will let you know,” Georgie says. “Or, I’ll go and I’ll yell at somebody or tell one of my friends.”

“I’ve never seen you yell,” Stassi says. “22 years and I’ve never seen you yell. It’s weird.”

“It is, you’re right,” Georgie agrees. “Obviously you’ve taken all of the psychopath out of me, maybe.”

“So it’s like, you just don’t act like a psycho because I’m your vehicle for it,” Stassi says. “When you see me be a psychopath you get to live vicariously through that. So every time I come home to Lake Arrowhead and you see me go nuts or fight with mom or stomp or scream or bitch about something, you’re like, ‘Oh —‘“

“‘—Why do I need to do it when she’s doing it for me?’” Georgie jokes.

“I’m basically your very own sauna,” Stassi says. “You’re sweating it out.”

“Yes,” Georgie agrees. “Precisely.”

“I want to talk about sadness and depression in an open, honest way.”

“At your most sad, how have you dealt with that?” Stassi asks Georgie.

“I think at my most sad…” Georgie begins. “In July my grandfather passed away in front of me.”

“We have different dads,” Stassi explains.

“I went to go visit him and my family, and he specifically took me to Tennessee because he wanted to show me where he was moving — he was super excited,” Georgie begins. “We went on a hike, which he wanted to do, and I heard our little cousin screaming, and I ran back, and there was my Papa on the ground and he had passed out. Immediately we started CPR, and he wouldn’t wake up, and the eyes rolled into the back of his head. I’m sitting there and my Nana is screaming, who’s my best friend, my grandmother. My little cousin is screaming, and my uncle is pounding his chest over and over again. We’re all just so frantic and I don’t know what to do. I just knew, even in that sadness, I didn’t have time to be sad, I didn’t have time to think, I just needed to make sure everyone else was okay. When he passed, it was the most sad I’ve ever been. I didn’t know who to turn to, I didn’t know who to talk to, I would have horrible dreams. My uncle Adam, every single night, he would be asleep doing CPR. We just couldn’t process it. Having me there, I felt like I could at least go through my own sadness knowing that everyone else was going through it with me. They were there, they knew, they knew the experience and the pain that I felt, and I think because of that, that helped me.”

“Have you ever felt like hurting yourself?” Stassi asks.

“No,” Georgie says. “I have in the past, but that was when I was a teenager.”

“I want to talk about sadness and depression in an open, honest way,” Stassi explains. “Not in a way that I want everyone to feel like they want to die right now, but, I think that it’s important to have an open dialogue and to be honest about how people handle sadness, or even when you’re not sad and you’re just confused. I have never said this on my podcast, ever. Only certain people know this. I used to hurt myself. And that’s something that I think about all the time. I don’t know if you remember because it was right after Hurricane Katrina and you moved to Lake Arrowhead from New Orleans with mom. Someone really close to me, a mentor, had committed suicide. He was my dad’s age. But he was my mentor in terms of acting and musical theater — he was my acting coach throughout high school. He would go to dinner with me and dad. He committed suicide and left a note that Hurricane Katrina had messed him up so much that he couldn’t handle it. I had never dealt with death before. Like truly, really dealt with death.”

// To hear more about how Stassi and Georgie have learned to cope with sadness and depression, LISTEN TO THE FULL PODCAST HERE. (Trigger warning: This episode contains honest and open discussions about depression and self-harm.)

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