On this episode of Straight Up with Stassi, Stassi struggles to return to normal life after returning from her recent whirlwind, life-changing trip to Europe.
“I wake up just wanting to eat carbs for breakfast, lunch, and dinner all over again,” Stassi says. “I just miss everything about Europe. I miss drinking red wine during the day. It’s a struggle right now, and the struggle is very real.”
“2016 was the year of yes,” Stassi explains. “2017 has been the year of no; the year of being home; the year of The Bachelor, wine, and dogs. That is what it’s been. So I said, yeah, Katie, hook a sister up, absolutely, I’m down. Whatever you want.”
She then asks Rachael to join, who says “yes” while drunk at Neiman Marcus, and Kristen has FOMO, so she decides to go as well. After the easiest traveling situation ever, they land in Copenhagen. But things go a bit awry when Stassi posts her airport outfit selfie on Instagram. (She was wearing a black trench by Morgan Clifford with her initials on the back, a newsboy black cap, a Burberry scarf with her initials, a necklace with her initials on a gold pill, her nameplate necklace, and black leather fingerless gloves embellished with black crystals.)
“I got a lot of people writing me that I was wildly inappropriate because S.S. had something to do with Adolf Hitler and Nazism,” Stassi explains.
After making it through that snafu, however, they make their way to their beautiful, historic Dutch Airbnb (which Stassi loves, because unlike a hotel, they get to be right in the middle of the town and pretend like they live there).
“I love feeling like I’m a local, or trying to trick people into thinking that I’m a local,” Stassi says.
After heaving her three heavy suitcases up three flights of stairs, they felt immediately at home. Until the woman who rented them the place gave Stassi the most devastating news ever.
“She brought out a big map to show us places to go and I said, ‘Where do we shop!?’ and she looked at me, which felt like a really long time. In that moment, I knew something was up. And she says, ‘Oh, you can’t shop until Tuesday.’ Umm… I’m sorry, what? It’s Saturday and we leave Wednesday at like 6:00 in the morning. So Saturday, Sunday, Monday, I’m going to be in this town and I can’t shop!? WHAT?”
She informed Stassi that this was because of Easter weekend. But don’t worry, Stassi survived. The rest of the week was filled with pub adventures with 19-year-olds, an awkward run in with a silent, people-filled Irish bar (turns out they were just very serious about their soccer), and yes, great shopping once the stores finally opened on Tuesday.
“Kristen had to go back to the US, so then the rest of us go meet Diana (“suck-a-dick-Diana”) in Paris,” Stassi explains. “Oh, oh, Paris. Paris 185% changed my life. I legitimately don’t think I have ever fell more in love and felt more at home in a city. If everything in my soul threw up, it would be Paris. Everything I could have asked for, minus ranch, was in Paris.”
Their apartment in Paris was even better than their Danish one, on the same street as the actual Chanel store (we’ll return to that later), as well as bars, cafés, and restaurants. Every single day, they walked anywhere from six to nine miles.
“I actually liked walking in Paris,” Stassi says. “That’s another reason that I know I am meant to be there. If I’m not bitching about walking nine miles, you know I must really love this place.”
Unfortunately, hours after they left the Champs-Elysées, a terror attack occurred in which two police officers were shot, one fatally.
“Everyone had been saying, ‘Paris might not be safe right now, might not be the best idea,’ and I’m always like, ‘Whatever, nothings a good idea.’ I could get in a car accident. There are so many things that could happen to me so I’m not going to not go to Paris because something might happen. And then something happened. Granted, we’re safe, but something happened. It really makes you think, ‘Holy shit.’ My heart goes out to any victim’s families. I can not imagine.”
The next day, they went to the Palace of Versailles, because, uh hello, Marie Antoinette.
“I had the perfect Versailles/Marie Antoinette-themed outfit. Okay? I bought these really expensive shoes online specifically for this. These beautiful pointy-toed canvas flats embellished with pearls and crystals with a black velvet tie-up around the ankle. They’re like modern Marie Antoinette. Then I had this black jumpsuit with another Morgan Clifford coat, but this time it was a light dusty blue trench coat and a silk black skinny neck scarf that I tied into a bow. I mean, so modern Marie Antoinette,” Stassi says. “Brains were probably exploding.”
After a run-in with a rude French taxi driver and waiting in line while getting tipsy on mini bottles of wine, they make it inside the Palace.
“Let me just say, I’ve never connected with a place so much in my entire life,” Stassi says. “I’m not even being dramatic, I know I sound dramatic, but I swear, I’m not being dramatic. Do you think maybe someone who lived at Versailles might be one of my past lives? I won’t even say Marie Antoinette, I won’t even go there, there were a million people that lived there. I could have even been one of the servants. Or one of the dogs. But for some reason, I just felt at home. So I’m on cloud nine. Cloud fucking 99.”
But then… they find out the Queen’s apartments were closed for renovation. Needless to say, Stassi was devastated. But after frolicking around the garden and spending some alone time to really take it in, all was well. (And she bought a shit-ton of Marie Antoinette crap from the gift shop.) To here more about the rest of the trip, including a very interesting experience at Moulin Rouge and of course, a Chanel purchase!